Sometimes when we have to choose between what is known, even if it’s horrible, it is better to choose that than what you don’t know because it could be much worse. We all tend to fall into this trap at one time or another. Even if we are miserable, we will stay in a bad situation because if we make a change, it might be far worse than the situation we were in.
Known things are comfortable. They reside in our comfort zone. And it can beautiful place because we feel safe there. The problem is, nothing ever grows in that environment. Continue reading
You may know this famous quote from The Godfather Part II or Machiavelli, but it dates back to Sun Tzu’s The Art of War. Friends are somewhat predictable and you know their strengths and weaknesses. The idea of keeping your enemies closer is all about knowledge, information and strategy. If someone is your enemy, it’s helpful to understand what their strengths and weaknesses are, how they think and what motivates their actions, what kind of tactics they may employ against you and what their pressure points are. Continue reading
Posted in Strategy
Tagged Adversity, Challenges, Ego, Enemies, Game, Growth, Heat, Human Nature, Machiavelli, Mastery, Motivation, Opportunity, Relationships, Resources, Respect, Sun Tzu, The Girl, The Godfather, Truth
While it may be easier to do something for someone else rather than take the time to show them how to do it, it doesn’t truly help them in the long run. If you take the time to teach someone how to do it for themselves, they gain mastery of it and they aren’t dependent on you or anyone else for help.
We find this concept harder to incorporate in our personal lives rather than professional lives. I used to work for a massive retailer and my boss and team members were constantly asking me to run reports for them. And of course it was always needed immediately. It became such a nuisance that I sat down with them and showed them how they could access the data and run the reports for themselves. This accomplished two things. One, it decreased how often they came to me for the reports and two, they weren’t dependent on only one person to provide the data and reports they needed. Continue reading
King Solomon possessed unrivaled wisdom. Today’s adage comes straight from the Biblical book of Proverbs. No one challenges the idea that one’s reputation holds great value.
A good reputation leads to trust. Trust leads to more options. Options allow us more choice in determining our future. But who judges our reputation? We don’t. Others do. Continue reading
You can give someone an opportunity or you can show them a path, but they must choose to take it for themselves. This saying also fits well with trying to helping someone. You can give them all the tools and resources, but if they don’t want to help themselves, they won’t.
For some people who feel an innate need to want to help people succeed in life, this can be hard advice to fully internalize. It’s understandable that we want the people we care about to have every opportunity and to be healthy and well. But sometimes we lose sight of the fact that just because we want these things for them; it doesn’t make us the authority of their life or know what’s best for them. They have every right to refuse the opportunities, resources and tools we present to them. It’s their life, and they set their terms on how they live it. Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged Control, Ego, Help, Human Nature, Lead, Let Go, Opportunity, Problems, Relationships, Resources, Respect, Success, The Girl
Coined from Shakespeare’s Julius Caesar, this metaphor means that people who run away from their challenges and problems die a little bit inside each time they do so. Their character slowly erodes away when they don’t confront what is ahead of them.
Adversity and challenges help us develop character. How we overcome struggle defines who we are. It helps us develop resilience. These lessons are life skills and when we don’t develop them, we end up in an arrested state of development as we get older. Everything becomes much harder because we simply lack the understanding of how to deal with and overcome our problems. Continue reading
Posted in Fear
Tagged Arrested Development, Challenges, Confrontation, Erosion, Growth, Judgment, Julius Caesar, Opportunity, Overcoming, Problems, Resilience, Strength, Struggle, The Girl
You may have noticed nothing ran yesterday. It was my day to post. I ran out of time before a busy evening. Today we take up an old chestnut that seems quite appropriate. Continue reading
Hardships and failures are our best teachers. We grow stronger by facing and overcoming them. The natural human response to pain is to run away from it. But some things we can’t hide from, and we inevitably have to deal with it and it can feel unbearable. At some point we will all endure heartache and pain that will threaten to destroy us, but we will overcome these moments of darkness and desperation. And that experience of getting through it will make us stronger.
Some of us have suffered tragedy after tragedy. I have listened to stories of what people have faced and overcome and have wondered how can one person go through so much, over a short period of time and be okay. It is inspiring to me and proof that we are indeed stronger in the places we have been broken. Continue reading
Posted in Suffering
Tagged Becoming Stronger, Darkness, Desperation, Disappointment, Failure, Fear, Growth, Hardships, Heartache, History, Hurt, Opportunity, Overcoming, Pain, Repair, The Girl, Vulnerability